How Long Should You Keep a Dilator In?

You are already on the road to success! If you are reading this article then you are starting to think or act on solving your sexual health issues.  

You may be thinking that vaginal dilator therapy may be right for you. You have learned that dilators or trainers are therapeutic devices that are cylindrical (phallic shaped) but are not anatomically correct. Dilators are used to treat a variety of conditions that can result in dyspareunia (pain with sexual intercourse).  They are also helpful to treat vaginismus, vaginal stenosis from cancer treatment, and vaginal narrowing that may be a result of decreased estrogen levels during menopause. 

So, what should I look for when buying a dilator?  Comfort should be your deciding factor. Silicone vaginal dilators that resemble body tissue are resilient and are a much more comfortable alternative than hard plastic dilators. Buying American-made products is always a good idea, this way you can rest assured that you buying a safe product and are helping our economy. Look for dilators that have a smooth shaft that makes them easy to clean. 

Always start by washing your dilator in warm soapy water. Find a quiet, calm room where you won’t be interrupted. Be very generous with a high quality lubricant. Put lubricant on your vulva as well as on the dilator. Make sure you don’t use a silicone lubricant with silicone dilators as it will affect the texture and integrity of the silicone. 

It is essential to follow instructions provided by your healthcare team. The dilator should be inserted gently, and don’t forget the lubricant to reduce discomfort. A little discomfort is okay, pain is not. Some women find that deep breathing exercises can help. 

Here are some breathing tips written by Jillian Romm a licensed sex therapist and nurse, that may be helpful: 

• Follow your out-breath as you let go and soften the muscles of the pelvic floor. It appears to be easier to relax the muscles when the body is in the relaxation phase of the breath cycle. Several women have told us that they count aloud as they exhale.

• Visualize your vagina and pelvic floor in a state of softness. A patient offered this image: “I imagine my vagina is made of stretchy elastic that can expand at my will. I picture my vagina enlarging to accept the dilator.”

• Carefully attend to the messages you are receiving from your body. Keep your belly soft and open to your breathing, keep your legs comfortably limp and relaxed, and keep your breathing easy and gentle.

For maximum effectiveness of vaginal dilation therapy, a woman should never begin with a dilator that is too large that causes pain on insertion. Patience is the key. Start with the smallest size that is comfortable, with the eventual goal of being able to accommodate your partner. This gradual progression from smaller to larger sizes allows the pelvic floor muscles to learn how to relax and stretch. The goal is to help allow for more comfortable penetration by decreasing pain and discomfort.

Be consistent. Dilate at least three times a week, while some healthcare professionals recommend 5-7 times. Check with your healthcare provider for the interval frequency and the length of time the dilator should be inserted.  But don’t overdo it.  If you are sore or experiencing more than slight discomfort then hold off for several days. On average most women find that about fifteen minutes per session is the sweet spot. 

In conclusion, always consult with your healthcare provider to come up with your specific treatment plan. The duration that a vaginal dilator should be keep inserted really depends on this plan and your individual needs. Remember to be patient and consistent. Be sure to incorporate dilator therapy into your daily/weekly routine. 

This is a collaborative post.